day 15

this morning little "I" said, "so mom, tj dumped you huh?" i said yes. she then says "well why would he do that?" i explain to her that you just didn't love me anymore. she thought about it for a minute and then said "well you know whoever his new girlfriend is now is SOOOO lucky! he's the best boyfriend".
I had to laugh. kinda cute. she loved you.
truth is, she was really angry when i told her you wouldn't be coming around anymore. this was before you spoke to me.
she was so upset. she stomped her feet and pouted. she said it wasn't fair. you had promised her that you would teach her to play golf.
i felt for her. i felt the same disappointment. and it angered me that you could do something so careless to my children. you know that they loved you. and you just dropped them, cut them right out of your life so easily. that makes me upset.
upset not only at you, but at myself. my poor children have seen too much heart break in their short lives. i told myself i would no longer let them get close to a guy i dated. it wasn't fair for them to "get dumped".
oh-well. i can't change it. and you did do so many kind things for them. i know that they will remember that.